Our baby pictures

These are my and my boyfriends baby pictures, so I am guessing that my son would look something like that when he is born. I still don't have a name for him, I didn't think it would be this hard to find one.

The Ugly Truth

Truth Is I don't like to look back in the past, but that's the only way I understand myself today. Sometimes I wish I could go back and change things but I can't, I just have to look forward and make sure I don't repeat the same mistakes again. I know that when my son is born I will be a good mother, but sometimes I get scared to raise my kid the way I was raised. I don't want this chain of pain to continue on, my mom was raised in a horrid way and she really didn't do a good job with me. I was abused physically and mentally, and its still haunting me today. Although, the relationship between me and my mother has grown, and I forgive her for everything, and regardless of how miserable i was growing up I love her unconditionally. The big problem is that even though my mom is their for me now, its a little too late just because I had to grow up and basically raise myself. Sometimes I wish i could be more outgoing and friendly, and have more friends, but I just shut every one out, and its kinda sad. The last thing I want is to be alone, but sometimes I'm the only one that understands me. I don't care what anyone thinks, your childhood is the most important stage of your life. How can you continue with out a sturdy beginning? Theirs no way in hell my child is going to be like me because I am broken person, that has not yet moved on from the past. I look in the mirror and I see the same little girl with a broken smile, the little girl who had to comb her own hair, talk to herself in the mirror, that little girl who was scared to sleep at night because she knew she would wet her sheets and get beat the next morning. For some reason those memories don't go away...

A bit of me ..

I'm a young girl, who had to grow up faster than most young people. I don't think I ever had a memorable childhood moment, and that is why sometimes I would like to relive my childhood now. I think that I am misunderstood and not easy to read, but once you get to know who I am you realize the beautiful things that come out of my soul. I am 19 years old and I am 5 months pregnant with a baby boy, although this was very unexpected, I am very excited to meet my son. This is my first child, and hopefully my only child.